I'll Hold You In Heaven


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In loving memory of Mia and Ryley and our precious ones…

“… I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me.” ~ 2 Samuel 12:23b

I’ll Hold You in Heaven

My precious baby… My aching heart longs to hold you, you’re the treasure of my heart! You grasp your fingers around mine tightly not wanting to depart. I caressed your cheek so softly. Your eyes looked warmly into mine. Your breath of life slipped away, it seemed before its time.

Your sweetness touched the hearts of many. Your presence still lingers on. I’ll hold you once again in heaven but now you’re in Jesus’ arms.

My eyes glance upwards toward heaven with tears streaming down my face. “Take care of my precious baby until I shall see her face.”

God’s love seemed to enfold me as peacefulness filled my heart. I could almost hear the choir of angels strumming their angelic harps!

Tell mommy for me Jesus I’ve been sheltered from many storms. It was the grace of God upon the innocent that He received me into His arms.

For I am under the wings of His protection. I’ve reached the Promised Land! Jesus loves the little children for of such is the kingdom of heaven.

For God is sovereign in His salvation He chooses whoever He will. He receives those who die as babies who have no merits of their own.

There’s no sadness here, nor sorrow… warm laughter fills the air! There’s multitude of angels, mommy, there’s babies everywhere!

God’s children all surround Him, He sets them on His knees. Each one of them are precious for the kingdom of heaven belongs to these.

The death of a child is heartbreaking, the most painful grief we’ll bear. You’re under the wings of the Lord, dear mommy, you’re in His loving care.

His love reached down from the heights of heaven to reach down His hand to hold mine. “I’ll hold you in heaven, my precious baby when God calls me home sometime!”

Your lips shall call me mommy, it’ll be music to my ears! I’ll have my dreams fulfillment… when I’ll hold you so near.

Jesus said, “…Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God.” ~ Mark 10:14b

“Today is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. Today, my heart has felt like it has been clenched numerous times at not only the thought of our angel baby, Ryley, but also at the thought of my angel nieces and nephews, and my friends’ angel babies.

My heart breaks, and I wish I could understand why God takes our babies so soon.

But I am also reminded of a verse that I read a while ago that has helped me: Ecclesiastes 4:3 “But better than both is the one who has never been born, who has not seen the evil that is done under the sun.” (NIV) Although we are unable to hold Ryley, God is holding our baby in his arms and is taking care of Ryley, while we here on Earth take care of our baby on the way. Who could possibly be a better caretaker for our Ryley than the one who takes care of us?”

“One year ago, on April 6th, 2017, we lost one of our babies. We had known we were pregnant for a couple of weeks then, and I was having almost daily panic attacks. But that morning, it was worse than it had been ever before. I couldn’t function at all. I couldn’t get ready for work. I woke up, and I just knew that something was wrong. I knew that something wasn’t right with the pregnancy. I set up an appointment with my doctor, and they ordered blood tests and an ultrasound. The ultrasound wouldn’t be for a couple of weeks, but they assured me that everything would be fine. My blood work came back with everything being okay, besides having a very low Vitamin D level.

I was eight weeks when we had the ultrasound. They first showed us that we had one healthy baby. And then they told us that we had lost a baby at around 6 weeks, which was the same day that I woke up and couldn’t function. I knew instantly that we had lost our baby that day.

I couldn’t help but wonder immediately why God had taken our baby. But then, in the next year, I realized why. In this last year, I have heard of and known many other women who have lost their babies. And this pain that God had me go through has helped me be able to walk with these women and help them with their pain. Each time I have heard of one, I have felt their pain and my own pain all over again.

And now, our healthy baby is 4 months old. I get to snuggle my precious boy every night. There are times I can’t help but wonder what it would have been like if I had been able to have twins. But right now, I am just grateful for my baby boy.

Sometimes, when we are hurting, we don’t understand why God does the things He does. We don’t see his full picture. But then, sometimes a year, sometimes a few years, in the future, we begin to see why God has us go through this pain. Most of the time, it’s so we can connect with people. It’s so that we can walk beside people who went through the same pain we did, and help them through their pain.

It’s been a year, and although sometimes my grief is strong, my God is stronger, and I now understand why He took our angel away. I found a verse that has helped me through some of the more difficult days. Ecclesiastes 4:3: “But most fortunate of all are those who are not yet born. For they have not seen all the evil that is done under the sun.” (NLT). Our angel baby is being held by our great and powerful God. Ryley will not know the pain of heartache, or the feeling of sadness. Ryley will know happiness, and will know the feeling of being held by our Savior. Thinking of that is what is helping me on this anniversary. Our Ryley is in Heaven, and is playing with all of the other angel babies. One day, I will get to hold Ryley. But for now, I know that Ryley is safe in the arms of our Savior, and cannot be harmed.”

Tonight, if you would like to receive the gift of eternal life, first you must believe in the Lord. You have to ask for your sins to be forgiven and put your trust in the Lord. To be a believer in the Lord, ask for eternal life. There’s only one way to heaven, and that’s through the Lord Jesus. That’s God’s wonderful plan of salvation.

You can begin a personal relationship with Him by praying from your heart a prayer such as the following:

 “Oh God, I’m a sinner. I’ve been a sinner all of my life. Forgive me, Lord. I receive Jesus as my Savior. I trust Him as my Lord. Thank you for saving me. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”

If you have never received the Lord Jesus as your personal Savior, but have received Him today after reading this invitation, please let us know. We would love to hear from you. Your first name is sufficient.

Today, I made peace with God...

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